Support, Love and Trust
by BonesBird
Summary: Morgan has to fight his demons, and is taking out his fear on the wrong people, his fiancée and his unborn son.  AU. M/G


**Title: Support, Love and Trust.  
****Summary: Morgan has to fight his demons, and is taking out his fear on the wrong people, his fiancée and his unborn son.**

**This was written because I thought this epic roleplay fight would make the perfect fic. So huge thanks to my Morgan, my friend and support Pat. Dude you are ace. Can****'****t wait to party it up in New York with you as soon as I get over there. This is all his baby. I was being dragged along in all this. Not one word of it was discussed by us before our characters said it.**

**Just a side note. I promise. "Alphabet" will be back soon.**

* * *

The wedding was all planned, but Derek hadn't seemed interested for the last few days. Even though they were discussing it, he wasn't completely involved in the conversation "There weren't many places we can get and your mom is Catholic. I thought she'd like it in a church. We can try to change if you want." The air in her office was completely still,

"No it's fine I guess. I need some air though." He shrugged and walked out of her office, after struggling out of her seat Penelope followed Derek down to the parking garage of the building, she was never going to catch up to him, so instead she called out

"Derek, are you alright?"

"Just need air" he paused, turned and nodded, she caught up with him a little, close enough to reach out to him if he gave any indication that was what he needed.

"Have I stepped over some line?" she asked, her voice breaking, she gave him a concerned look and it all seemed to crash on his shoulders in that instant.

"No." He started walking again with that simple statement, not showing any regret for the pain he was causing her. She stopped trying to catch up with him,

"Derek what is your problem?" She shouted, clapping her arms to her sides,

"I told you I needed air!" He snapped, causing her to flinch, even across the garage. "You're the one who followed me out here! Stop with the questions and let me think!" She heard his growl, and decided that she and Daniel didn't need this

"You know what. I'm gonna see if I can stop with Emily tonight. I don't need you in this sort of a mood around me" She said, loud enough for him to hear her, but quiet enough that it didn't cause Daniel to kick her any harder than he already was doing

"Whatever. I have work to do." and with that he was gone, back into the door that lead to the Bullpen. She went the other direction and headed to her cave, barely holding in her tears

"You know what Dan, I don't even know what I've done this time." she whispered to the bump that was holding the baby she had craved.

_

* * *

Derek slammed his fists first into a wall of the corridor to the BAU, then onto his desk. __"__Shit__"__ he exclaimed, realising what he__'__d done. He felt like an idiot, but there was too much for him to do. He threw the files off his desk. Causing the pile of papers to cascade to the floor. He knew beyond everything that he needed to talk to Hotch._

* * *

Later on in the day Penelope decided it was time to go and get a bag, Emily had been happy to have her, even though she wasn't sure why a couple she thought were perfect together ever needed time apart. As she was taking a bag down the stairs Derek walked in the door, he looked up at her and sighed, turning around and leaving. She wasn't letting anything fall like this, she wasn't letting him leave her without a word. She put the bag down by the car. He seemed to notice she needed to talk, and stopped and turned to her.

"I'm going staying with Emily. Just. Give me a call when you wanna know about your son. Since you're clearly not bothered with me right now." She looked down, placing a hand on her stomach. She didn't want to pressure him for an answer he didn't want to give. "You know, I was so happy this morning. Now I'm not sure what I am." she finished, with a tear in her eye, he looked at her and took a deep breath, moving a few steps closer to him.

"Carl gets out of jail Thursday. That man I thought was like my dad. Look I love you but I needed time and you weren't exactly listening. I care about you and Dan but now I just need to figure out what I want to do about Carl." She remembered that. It had been almost impossible for her to forget him. She had never hated a man she'd never met more. Because this UnSub hadn't targeted random victims, but one of hers. Even then they'd been incredibly close. She sighed that he hadn't said anything to her.

"You never said anything about it. Derek. How am I supposed to know if you never tell me these things. Ever since we've been together, aside from meeting your mom, you never want me to ask about you. When I do you dodge the question." She took a tiny step forward, not wanting to overstep herself. "You have a family here Derek, a family you should focus on. Dan and I will be alright without you while you search for whatever it is you're searching for. But don't cast us off to one side. Remember what you have told me, every year on the anniversary my parents died. You tell me _"forget the past, look to the future"_ and this time, when we have a real future. You're not following your own advice. Maybe we've too much going on, with the wedding and Daniel. Maybe we should cancel the wedding, let you get your head together. I just don't know what I can do, Derek, to make this easier for you." She almost cried, just wanting to understand what had gone on.

"Pen, I want to forget Chicago. I want to forget what he did. Your so worried about everyone else that I don't want you worrying about me. I can take care of myself. I want this wedding just as much as you do. I just need to go to the trial and deal with this."

"Derek I'm gonna be your wife, one day. I'm supposed to worry about you and I will, always and forever worry about you over everyone else in my life. You and Daniel are my whole world. I literally have nothing else." She sniffed, looking at him with a look of resignation. In that moment he realised that she expected him to tell her he was leaving for good.

"I don't want you to worry. I can care for you and Daniel even if it scares me to death that at any moment it could be taken away. I'm supposed to worry about you that's my job as your future husband and as Daniel's father." his tone soften, and he tried not to sound as aggressive as he had been

"You really think wives don't worry as much for their husbands? Derek that's mighty chauvinistic of you. I worry about you every day we're not together. Remember Chicago last time, remember New York, Boston, Milwaukee. Derek, I always worry about you I can just hide it behind my cheery personality, especially before we got together, because I didn't want the team to see how different my worries for you were from the rest of them. Get it into your head I worry. Just because I don't show it doesn't mean I'm not going to." She shot back, she was hurt, and wasn't sure what was going on

"I know you worry but you don't have too. I didn't die with Foyet, the car bomb and I plan on sticking around a lot longer. One day I could wake up and you and DJ be gone. I don't need a church or all our friends just you and DJ" The emotion in his voice showed the truth of his words,

"That's all I want. Just you and me and Daniel. That's all I need." she took a step forward, closing the distance between them. "Our jobs are so dangerous, one day you might be out on a case and an UnSub could take you from me. We've come so close so many times. I love you more than anything else Derek, and I can't bear that thought." her voice broke as she entertained the thought,

"You think I'd leave you a single mother? You must have taken some crazy pills. We know the risk an yet we go against every warning and save people. We live what we do." He looked down at her downcast face, her obvious melancholy forcing him to confront what he'd done.

"And we do what we love." she said honestly, shaking her head "This is something I live with and have lived with every single day since I met you and I will keep living with it until the day you retire." she took another step forward, and lowered her voice "I don't know what you're planning on doing, or where you're planning on going, I don't think I want to know. But just remember that I love you, we love you, more than anything else in the world, and we'll be waiting for you when you get home."

"I want to know that Carl's not going to haunt me anymore. I want closure. I don't want to be afraid of him. I love you so much it hurts. And I love Daniel also. I didn't want to hurt you or him." he wanted to wrap his arms around her, and reassure her that he wouldn't do anything that put them in danger. Penelope took a final step forward, reaching out for a hand he gladly gave her

"We'll be here. Both of us. Waiting for you to come home to us. I love you"

"I don't see why you live me but I love you too." He leant down and kissed her. Trying to get all his feelings into the kiss, it took a moment for her to return it, and a second later she pulled back

"I love you because you are you. That's all I need. Promise me you'll come home" she wrapped her arms around him,

"I would tell you all the ways I love you but I don't think we would have time. I promise I will be here in one piece maybe a couple bruises but one piece." he hoped his words would reassure her, but instead she started to cry. "It's alright baby girl. I didn't mean to make you cry."

"You sure" she mumbled against him, clinging to his back

"Hey hard head. I'm fine. Nothing bad can happen." his chin tapped the top of her head as he talked, he dropped a hand to Daniel's home for the next few months, she smiled up at him

"How about we have a stiff drink. You can have the alcohol, I'll have Orange juice." her recent craving, and her most normal. He laughed and thought about everything that had crystalised in his mind since he'd started talking to her.

"No drinking tonight. I finally have a clear head about everything I'm not about to drink and over think it." he shook his head, realising she was shivering he started leading them towards the house

"Then you can have some Orange juice too. Can we go inside. It's really cold." she said, as if reading his mind.

"That's where I'm going baby girl" He grinned, and shut the door behind them.

**

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There is more. But I****'m happy to leave it there. Once again thanks to my wonderful Morgan - Pat.**


End file.
